Disney's original adaptation of Pinocchio is seen by many critics and fans as being one of their best and most beautiful films ever. That's certainly not the case with the recent live-action remake, however, which will have to wish upon a star to save itself from the veritable shellacking it's currently receiving from critics and audiences. Despite the presence of big time actors like Tom Hanks, the 2022 remake of Pinocchio appears to be a big time failure.
Seen by many as completely unnecessary and woefully inferior to the original, the new Pinocchio sticks too close to the original in some areas while being too inaccurate in others. Even though it's available "for free" for Disney+ subscribers, many of those who've seen it still feel as if they've been robbed. Here's why Pinocchio isn't a real boy, but instead a real bad movie.
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Across the board, reception to Pinocchio is not good. Many of the criticisms for the movie are culminations of how audiences and critics alike felt about most of the Disney live-action remakes. That's to say, the movie largely feels soulless and unnecessary at best, and almost insulting at worst. The CGI and the uncanny valley imagery that it creates is noted as incredibly off-putting to most, and it also makes it questionable as to how much of a "live-action" remake the movie even is.
Other critiques include the film's need to inject modern pop culture references into the story, none of which are appropriate. For instance, Honest John at one point suggests that the name "Chris Pine" would be a good pseudonym for the wooden Pinocchio. He also brings up the idea of Pinocchio gaining fame as an "influencer," and the less-than-subtle remark is much less than clever. Many also made less-than-flattering comparisons between Tom Hanks' version of Geppetto and his portrayal of Colonel Tom Parker in the much better received musical movie Elvis. As rough as it all may sound, the worst part of Pinocchio's reception is that it's all too deserved.
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Pinocchio is only one of several recent Disney live-action remakes, most of whom have continually trundled downhill in quality with each new release. For as synthetic and manufactured as it was, however, at least the Lion King remake could bank off a much more marketable and beloved franchise. The original Pinocchio is indeed a classic, but it doesn't quite muster up the same nostalgia as The Lion King for audiences nowadays. Thus, the criticisms for that live-action remake are multiplied ten-fold for Pinocchio. The CGI is indeed troublesome, the added changes are indeed ridiculous, and the original is indeed a much better film.
Perhaps the best decision that Disney made with Pinocchio was simply dumping it on Disney+ instead of releasing it theatrically. That would have likely resulted in an even bigger box office flop than the recent failure of Lightyear, itself an unnecessary extension of a pre-existing franchise. Sadly, these sorts of assembly line remakes are likely here to stay, with more movies like Pinocchio crawling to Disney+ or theaters in the near future.
Robert Zemeckis' live-action Pinocchio remake starring Tom Hanks is now streaming on Disney+.