I haven't worked outside my home in 10 years. I've been a stay-at-home mom for quite some time and the transition that I was half dreading and half looking forward to is upon me. The last time I worked was in December 2012 when I was nearly 9 months pregnant with my first child. My place of employment was not happy about my pregnancy at all and my male boss was less than thrilled that it was a high-risk pregnancy where I had to go to weekly doctor appointments for multiple weeks, sometimes twice in one week.
These, of course, were only able to be scheduled when I undoubtedly needed to miss some part of the work day even if it was the very end or very beginning. My job asked me how much time I would like to take off after having my baby and I nervously asked for 12 weeks. That was met with the request they would prefer that I take 6 weeks. My female manager explained that daycare took babies at 6 weeks for a reason so that moms can get back to work. The funny thing was that they weren't paying me nearly enough to afford the much higher daycare fee for a 6-week-old newborn in full-time daycare.
It wasn't even close to enough money to afford that. When I gave birth on the 3rd day of 2013, I made the fairly easy decision to not go back to work and I love that I've been able to be home with my kids. It's certainly a privilege to not have had to work for money, but we aren't living a lavish lifestyle with many extras. I clipped coupons, did free activities, and cooked at home all the time. We did what we had to raise a family on one income. An income that came from a career in education, so it's really not as much as some people think.
Staying home drove me a bit bonkers most days, but it also made me so happy. I had a second kid and looked forward to my time home with her as well. I saw it all and witnessed it all. I learned so much about babies, toddlers, and myself.
RELATED: The Differences Between Millennial Moms And Gen Z Moms
As they say, the days are long and the years are short. So, so long and so very short. I knew it would happen one day, and before I knew it, both of my kids were in elementary school all day. What? How? These days seemed so far away, and now I'm in the middle of it. We're deep in the school years and honestly, I'm excited about it. I'm ready to have more of an identity outside my kids, and I'm enjoying them being older and not wiping their butts anymore.
For me, it wasn't until January of this year when my kids went to in-person school after that whole pandemic. And then my mom died soon after that in March and my kids would be home for summer in mid-May. I took that time to grieve and cry, and wonder what life was like now.
But now, a new school year is upon me, and I'm ready to begin venturing out of my home for some time. I'm still very much in the need of self-care and gentleness after my mom's death, but I can't sit home forever nor do I want to.
I've updated my resume, and thankfully I did have some stuff to add to it. I've changed my skills and have changed what I'm looking for in a job. I put my kids in soccer, and they will both will be taking music lessons, so I need something either with a school or part-time during the day. I've known for a long time that working moms struggle to do make these events or even put their kids in them and quite honestly, I didn't even think of working when I happily signed my kids up for sports for the first time since the pandemic.
But I can't work after 4:00 pm which has led me to seek out opportunities either in our local school district or some sort of store that would adhere to just a daily schedule. I know I'm immensely privileged that I don't need to be the breadwinner. If I did, I would do what I needed and seek aftercare and forgo the activities, or just start working earlier in the morning.
However, I am where I'm at, and I have a 10-year gap on my resume. My work experience is low for my age and I quite honestly don't have many unique skills. I don't have an advanced degree either. I'm very nervous to see what I can find that can work for me and my family. Work has changed a lot in 10 years, and I'm glad there are many remote opportunities.
I'm sure I'll find myself subbing for the school district or maybe waiting tables, but whatever it is, it's a big step for me.