I spent four hard, amazing years living in a van before deciding I wanted a home without an emergency brake.
Back when I built out my 2006 Dodge Sprinter in 2016, residing on the road full-time wasn't a mainstream lifestyle. After all, most people didn't have jobs that could be done remotely.
I wanted to travel and rock climb as much as possible, so I went all over the United States and Canada, bouncing from California to Utah to British Columbia to Yosemite National Park and back. I also met some incredible people.
But it wasn't all glamorous. By the time I moved into a house in Moab, Utah, in 2020, I'd been kicked out of many overnight parking spaces and had more breakdowns than I could count.
Here are the main reasons I gave up full-time van life.
Because of the everyday tasks required to keep a van up and running, I had significantly less free time when I was on the road than I do now.
My house in Moab has running water, a consistent Wi-Fi connection, a shower, a safe place to sleep, and laundry machines.
These things weren't all guaranteed in my van, at least not on a daily basis. I had to spend time and resources locating and securing them in every single town and campground I pulled into.
Many times, I'd finish a day of climbing only to remember that the local aquatic center or gym where I usually showered had closed for the day. Sweaty and exhausted, I wouldn't be able to properly wash off until the following morning.
After four years, those minor inconveniences piled up and became too exhausting to handle.
Van life made me feel free and untethered, but, more often than not, I was also very lonely.
Whenever I visited a new place, I would often see it through a tourist's lens, which was isolating since I traveled solo and did many of the activities on my own.
When I had the chance to socialize, I loved meeting fascinating new people on the road. However, I felt like I was always introducing myself and building new friendships from scratch.
Days or weeks after introducing myself, I'd say goodbye, drive to a new town, and do it all over again. The cycle was draining.
I'm grateful for my four years on the road. Toward the end of them, I just realized that it was time for a change.
I was done searching for a safe place to sleep and scouring for a reliable Wi-Fi connection. I was ready to have a community that would stand by me even when the weather was bad or campsites were closed.
More than anything, I wanted to make friends who have the time to get to know me.
I haven't completely turned my back on the lifestyle. I still spend long periods of time in my van.
Each summer, I drive out of the Moab heat in search of cooler temperatures and enticing rock climbs. But I set out on these small journeys knowing that my house and my community are waiting for me when I return.
One day, I might give full-time van life another try. For now, I'm sticking to shorter trips.