© Provided by Tribune News ServiceThomas P. Farley.
Restoring civility one column at a time
Doubtful Doctor
A good friend who's a physician recently resigned her hospital position because she does not believe in the vaccines that combat COVID-19. I am in utter disagreement and yet am unsure how to discuss this with her, given our very opposite opinions.
Throughout the pandemic, we've heard the phrase "follow the science." So it's only natural you're surprised to learn your friend - who chose a career in science - has made a decision contrary to the wisdom of the greater medical community.
Much as her position may be contrarian, the fact that she was willing to resign from her role demonstrates how confident she is of her opinion. As with deeply held political beliefs, your chances of changing her mind are likely nil. Providing there are no nefarious factors driving her decision, I recommend you hear her out, ask probing questions and, when all is said and done, resist the urge to criticize. There is a certain nobility in her adherence to her principles, and much as they may buck the science, by opting out, she is following her own conscience.
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As a true friend, be there for her in the months ahead as she grapples with the challenges of finding a meaningful job in her chosen field that does not test her personal ethics. I don't envision her new path to be a simple one.
Clueless Company
My husband recently hosted a small work meeting at our home, and one of his colleagues - who resides four hours away - called the afternoon before to advise she would be arriving a day early. She showed up a few hours later and without even asking assumed she would be staying overnight with us. We welcomed her, of course. But is there another way we could have handled this awkward situation?
If there is one thing that vexes hosts more than a guest who arrives fashionably late, it's a guest who arrives unconscionably early. But in this case, the issue was not that you hadn't yet put out fresh hand towels or pulled the canapes from the oven. It's that you were instantly expected to transform your house into a bed and breakfast.
Given that she is neither a good friend nor a family member - the sort of person you might welcome at any time and under any circumstances - your hospitality was above and beyond the call of duty.
Should there be a next time, be polite but honest, stating: "I wish we were set up to accommodate you this evening. Can I assist in any way with a hotel recommendation? There are some lovely ones in the area." Whether this particular early bird ever gets the worm, at minimum, let's hope she gets the message.